i finished my research paper after 2 weeks of wishing i'd finished it, so still being awake seems natural. congratulations for surviving, kid, you only have 3 more years of this. the major source of my stress left me with my final point, and then my printer ran out of ink. life sure is funny, sometimes.
i'm thinking of you coming back into my life, and i was wondering if you'd do it slowly? slower than you left, and slower than you entered, please. maybe it would be best if you only came back on weekends. holidays would be okay, too, and the occasional rainy day. just don't do it too often, and don't say too much. i have my own opinions these days, you know. i hope you do too. i don't want this, i do want this, but everything outside of me screams to wait. and so i do wait, and i'm starting to like that feeling. like playing guitar and making use of the wrong chords. it's like discovering that i can breathe. it is entirely rational and yet completely illogical. or maybe the other way around. did i ever really believe in life any differently?
maybe, on second thought, being awake isn't rational either.
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