burritos. snapped glasses. ford. piles of laundry. the shining. mascara. watching someone smoke a cigarette. knit gloves. life aquatic. short lines at the dmv. next semester. text messages. the train. naps. the Bible. cute jackets. french press. npr. alligator. bags of green apples. curly hair. perfect jeans. getting a paycheck. ten years later. story ideas.

it's the simple things that just make life more interesting.

some things i have lost in the past few days:

1. my debit card or two.
2. my license
3. my whole entire wallet.
4. my appetite
5. hours of sleep
6. control
7. uncertainty.
8. occasional sanity.

some things i have won:
1. a football game.
2. ten years in utah.
3. free food at mcdonalds.
4. Jesus Christ.

and i want to pick up a bad habit more than ever right now. my flesh, it kills me.

today i learned two things:


that if someone smiles at you big enough, there is no way to keep from smiling back. even if the person is just a boy with blonde hair that has no idea what is going on. it is physically impossible, even if it happens repeatedly and you're used to it.


that you can really get a good cup of coffee for under two bucks without using discounts or coupons or any of that.

a few days ago, i just completely forgot that i was in school, and it took me until around now to remember. today is the first day in about two or three weeks that i have gotten home to an empty house and had time to stop doing anything.i've been doing so much that my head even forgets important things like when my birthday is or the date or why i even live in salt lake, utah. yup, it's the first friday i can even remember in the two months that i've lived here that i've had nothing going on after 7 PM. looking back, that is just plain exhausting, and now i am wondering what in the world two weeks of being in charge of children and houses i could never afford has done to me. but always, it's easy to see that God gives me more grace in the times that i want to run down every orange cone on the road and quit grocery shopping or even cooking ever. and also, he gives it when i just want to run down to provo on my own strength just to sleep in my bed for hours.

the funny thing is that, 5 years ago, i would have never thought my life on a sunday night would be watching a walk to remember with a german girl that has seen it eight times.


but the living in salt lake part doesn't surprise me much.

today started out with a

late
alarm
clock
and a
maddashtotrax.

yup, and that mad dash was worthless after i passed the ambulances and firetrucks and mounts of police just for a full parking lot. and that mad dash led to another mad dash that did no good, and finally to target. target led to the one place that makes me feel like a five-year old, which happens to be across from the first place i attended high school.

welp, after awhile i guess public transportation decided to be on my side, and i was able to go to class and sit next to a middle-aged man during a test. i probably did bad, so naturally i celebrated by going back to my love hate relationship with trains. but this time i had people to share it with. i had another middle aged man across from me reading a book about sexual desires. i had a man behind me with thousands of dollars of tattoos and a heart to make the girl across from him love him. at his stop i heard him tell her he had to 'get out of here before i start stalking you.". i saw two girls dressed like twilight vampires, walking through the park, and sometimes life here makes it too hard to remember i am in utah.

the end of the line, as far as we go.

this semester just seems to drag on and on. i bet it is because one of my professors is a computer. yup, she lives in there, probably, and she has a real fancy last name. it's hard to read for a class where the professor doesn't stand in front of your face for at least 50 minutes some days of the week. sometimes i even forget i am taking it at all.

i guess maybe it could be dragging on because of the face that i have two classes about weather, too. i don't even care about weather much, and i really don't care that one of my professors wears pants up to his bellybutton, or that the other one clearly can't stand her grad-student t.a. i should probably be able to predict what in the world the sky is doing by now, but instead i wake up shocked every morning that it is cold. oh, utah. oh, general education.

but it is definitely not dragging on because of oil painting class, because i only have eight more class days of that one left. my assignments are usually to get oil paint everywhere and make my room smell like a chemical mess, or something along those lines, but that one is pretty simple for me.