today she was gone, because she decided not to come back from vacation, after all. and i am left wondering what it's like to be liberal in utah, and if her husband will find a job in cedar city. i even think that i will miss her complaining, at 8:30 AM. that's what happens when you just count money for a living. things just stop making sense. today i saw harry potter scribbled on george washington's face, even.

but anyways, i haven't thrown back for a few days, and my heart is feeling pretty fine. the other night i learned how to play settlers of catan, so i think i'll be okay in salt lake. now i just need to figure out how to buy good shampoo, and i should be set. the shows at gallivan make it harder to breathe lately. i bet that's what it feels like to be a toy in a machine, even, everything so mixed up. the giant claw still hasn't come for me though, and i am totally fine with that. in fifteen days, i'll be a member of salt lake city. i don't know if i'll ever be able to grasp that, but i think it will be okay. God has something too good for me up there.


for now, i will just think about how weird it is that i'm not in colorado.